The 12 terrors of Christmas

By John Hanscombe
Updated December 10 2016 - 9:31am, first published 9:28am
The 12 terrors of Christmas
The 12 terrors of Christmas

The 12 days of Christmas are sweet and all but where’s the reality? Right here, people.

We know it. You know it.

There are probably more than 12 terrors of Christmas but we don’t want to bring the mood down. It’s a round, Christmass-y number, 12 is fine … maybe one or two will resonate for you.

No.1

The 12 terrors of Christmas
The 12 terrors of Christmas

We should be prepared. After all, it comes around on the same date every year. But we never are. Melbourne Cup should be the tripwire. As the champagne-and-chicken fog clears on the first Wednesday of the month, the sudden but short-lived realisation Christmas is coming should wake us all up to the need to shop (a whole other terror), plan ahead, get ourselves organised. Never happens. Before you know it, the Big Day is bearing down on you like the southbound express and you’re standing dumbstruck in its tracks. 

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